Author: saranaso14

Fear is a natural emotion. It is a biochemical reaction that happens when our body is put into a situation that makes us feel threatened. Physically, the body will go into “fight or flight” mode, which can increase your adrenaline levels, heart rate, and make you sweat. The body is preparing itself to either fight or run. It’s automatic and may seem like theres nothing you can do about it. However, that’s not necessarily true. 

We all have a personal emotional response, that’s what dictates what makes some people pee themselves, while others may live for the adrenaline rush. It also is the distinction between what phenomenon actually triggers someone’s fear. Most fears are learned, but some are instinctual. The fears that are learned are the ones we want to target and eliminate.

Trauma can be a cause of future fears. It can be as small as a car accident or as big as coming back from combat in the army, but PTSS/PTSD (post traumatic stress syndrome/disorder) is serious and can feel uncontrollable. Since everyone experiences it slightly different as well, it’s harder to diagnose and treat since there is no “one process fits all.” Since it’s possible for PTSD victims to eventually grow out of or become comfortable with their fear, it may not be necessary to seek a doctors help.

There are a few categories to fear: instinctual, learned, traumatic, and phobias. Identifying what kind of fear you have can help you target how to eliminate it. 

Here’s a few methods of conquering those fears. 

1. Acknowledge your fears. How can you overcome something, if you haven’t even recognized its existence? You need to know what it is and how it is controlling you. Since it is rooted deep in your subconscious, it may take some time to identify why it’s there and where it came from. Once you can accept that you have this fear, you open up the option to let it go. 
2. Face them and beat them. Exposure therapy is a very practical and efficient technique many doctors will use to help patients get over anxiety, fear, and other problems they want to overcome. This is probably the most extreme and (personally) effective. Now, if you’re scared of sharks, I am not implying to go swim with a shark. I am saying that certain fears are small or easy enough to overcome on your own. A fear of sharks can be considered rational, just don’t let it control you’re fun day at the beach. You can learn to manage and grow out of most fears by showing yourself they aren’t worth the worry. I think social anxiety is a big one that can be faced on a daily basis. Fear of presentation is another. Just speaking in general to people you don’t know can terrify some. So, go for it. Prepare for your presentation THOROUGHLY; if you’re an expert on the subject, you won’t have trouble talking about it. When you order food at a restaurant, make eye contact, and try to have a conversation with the waiter, it may be awkward, but at least you’re taking a step. Expose yourself to the little social experiences to prepare yourself for the bigger ones. 
3. Seek therapy. Yes, I did say in #2 to face your fears, but sometimes you can be doing more harm than help. The severity of the fear will determine whether medical attention is necessary. A trained medical professional will know the best option for your situation. In terms of exposure, they will know how to successfully expose you to those fears for the perfect amount of time without causing more trauma on the brain and conscience. But, it’s understandable that this option isn’t possible for everyone, just know serious traumaticly caused fears may need this to ever actually change.
4. Unlearning your fear. Most phobias are learned behaviors that make you feel unsafe and panicked. Exposing yourself to a large quantity of the feared object/situation for a prolonged period in a controlled and SAFE environment can teach your body it’s actually okay. It’s like getting past the first day at a new job, you feel panicked and nervous, but once you get past that first day, it becomes easier and easier until it just becomes comfortable. Adapting and learning is an important part of dismantling that fear. 

Remember that having a moderate amount of anxiety and fear about something new is completely normal and healthy. Your body will naturally react to things that are new or make it feel threatened. It’s how you protect yourself! If that didn’t happen, humans wouldn’t have survived as long as we have. If you aren’t scared easily, you may just be a relaxed and outgoing person, but there’s something that gets to everyone. With the right support and persistance, you can conquer almost any fear.

Be safe this Halloween!!

Disclaimer: I am in no way a medical professional. Nothing said on this blog is meant to cure or diagnose anyone or anything. I just want others to know; they are not alone. I am only a 19-year-old girl who does make mistakes and may also get incorrect information. I try to interpret what I read/learn and relay it back in my own unique way. If anyone has an issue or correction to anything that is read on this site, feel free to contact me and let me know at “bemoreyouhealth@gmail.com” Thank you for reading and always share love and kindness. 

“Be curious, not judgmental.” – Walt Whitman

This world is full of fast-paced competition. People are constantly comparing their “successes” and “failures” to those around them, always striving to either do better or boost their ego. It is human nature to be judgmental, but it’s a useless and hurtful trait we possess. It’s the leading cause of division between people and hurts our relationships. When thinking about it, it’s easier to judge someone rather than go out of your way to learn, adapt, and understand. But I think it’s genuinely worth it in the end. 

I think jealousy and judgment play hand-in-hand. One of the reasons you may judge someone else is because you are envious of who they are or what they are doing. Not always, but I think that is a big part of it. Remember that life isn’t a competition, it’s not a race to see who can be the most successful, the most joyful, nor the most fulfilled. Be conscientious about your own goals and dreams in life, but don’t base them off others.

So, how can we eliminate those feelings of jealousy? One way is to look for the alternative to it. But what’s the substitute of jealousy? Admiration! Admiring a person’s success or happiness will fulfill you rather than deplete you. Remind yourself to feel happy for others so that you can use your positive mindset and energy to motivate yourself. By practicing admiration and acceptance towards what others have, you give yourself the chance to believe you are worthy of those things as well, instead of feeling envious over it. 

When it comes to judgment, it’s also important to remember that you don’t know everything, and there’s always room to learn more. No one knows everything and the people that can accept that are the ones that will continue to adapt and have a more open-minded outlook on the world. Don’t be self-righteous, we all can teach others around us, whether it’s a ten year old or an eighty five year old, we all possess different knowledge. 

The best approach to eliminating judgmental thoughts from your mind is to try to change your thought process. 

1. Practice your first reaction to something new or weird, by being curious and asking questions, instead of automatically judging it because you don’t understand. Be positive and practice giving the benefit of the doubt. 
2. Remember, we all have our weird habits. You most likely do things that others may find very odd, but that doesn’t give them to right to judge you. See where I’m going with this? Consider your quirks before judging others on theirs.
3. If you said out loud, what you’re thinking about someone, how would it sound? If it’s a judgemental thought, it would probably be insulting. Target these thoughts so you can accept them.
4. Come to acceptance with the explanation that you may not agree with or the things you don’t understand. Remember that not everything in life is meant to be perfect and logical. The more you try to learn from life, the more it will teach you rather than confuse you. 
5. Be loving and positive. Being compassionate and understanding will eliminate that feeling of judgment and envy to open positive thinking and acceptance. When a negative thought does come into your mind, be able to recognize that it is only a thought, not a sign of right or wrong, nothing more than a thought. 

In the end, we all are working towards the same thing, to get through life happily. Basically, the three adjectives to remember from this post is understanding, curiosity, and admiration. Let’s strive to exclude judgment and jealousy from our everyday lives, and seek to spread positivity and acceptance towards others. Curiosity will set your judgments free and open your mind to new things you may have never known you’d LOVE! 

Disclaimer: I am in no way a medical professional. Nothing said on this blog is meant to cure or diagnose anyone or anything. I just want others to know; they are not alone. I am only a 19-year-old girl who does make mistakes and may also get incorrect information. I try to interpret what I read/learn and relay it back in my own unique way. If anyone has an issue or correction to anything that is read on this site, feel free to contact me and let me know at “bemoreyouhealth@gmail.com” Thank you for reading and always share love and kindness. 

The biggest struggle most people don’t even realize they have is being too focused on WHAT can make them happy, and not the fact that they already have it infront of them. They need to change their mindset. Is there one main way to achieve happiness? No, of course not. Everyone is different, and we all have our definitions of being happy. But, loving and accepting your own life can open that mindset of happiness. Looking at life in that “glass half full” kind-of-way will shape your mind to be more optimistic and accepting of unhappy situations. Whenever you encounter a situation that becomes stressful, breathe, and remember that there is a solution to almost every problem. There is always a bright side to every dark situation. Like yin and yang, like the sun shining on one side of the earth, while the other side experiences a dark, glooming moon.

Some small tips for beginning thinking positive:

1. Identify the bad and good in your life. Knowing and being mindful of what’s both good and bad in your life makes it easier to love the good and make peace with the bad.
2. Examine those bad experiences and emotions. How did you react during them? What were your first thoughts? It’s important to recall these experiences so that you can mature and advance your response for next time.
3. Practice letting things go. Start with the small aggravating things that may fuel the fire throughout the day. If the coffee barista (*cough* starbucks employee *cough*) messes up your coffee tomorrow morning, be kind and forgiving while asking them to remake it, then let it go. If someone cuts you off in traffic, don’t honk your horn, don’t let it get the best of you. Maybe, they couldn’t see your car entirely, or they’re an elder and have trouble driving. Practicing being calm, and understanding will benefit how you react in bigger situations.
4. Change some of your perspectives. It’s tough to look at things from a different perspective, but it’s important to remember that you do have the power to change yourself and your life. Find a few things in your life you’d like to adjust and work on improving them. One of the causes of being unhappy is feeling helpless or lack of control. Gain control of your life and have faith in your self!

Having a negative attitude can become a habit over time and hurt your self-esteem and ability to be positive. It’s important to avoid blaming yourself for issues that come up into your life. Blame is never helpful in any situation and causes you to look back to the past rather than grow and change for the future. Be mindful of those negative emotions and try reacting to them differently.

Now, thinking positive won’t necessarily make you happy, I am pushing the idea of thinking positive because it may not only benefit your mental health but also benefit and impact the lives of the others around you. Coming into contact with a positive person that handles a negative situation with a calm and sensible attitude can make your day better and be inspiring. Being a positive person is not a bad thing, and it will undoubtedly benefit your day to day life! It may not be the thing that fills the “void” in your life… but remember learning to love your own life may do it!

The worst is when we compare our lives and lifestyles with others. You shouldn’t let someone else’s lifestyle boost your confidence or bring you down. Letting go of those insecurities about your life will help you find joy rather than envy. It’s important to remember that we are all on the same journey; we all go through obstacles and challenges that can impact our lives tremendously. We can’t be sitting around focusing on what’s wrong with our lives, and we can’t be infatuating over other people’s lives. We need to learn love our own lives, or we are never going to be able to be happy and share our love with others.

Disclaimer: I am in no way a medical professional. Nothing said on this blog is meant to cure or diagnose anyone or anything. I just want others to know; they are not alone. I am only a 19-year-old girl who does make mistakes and may also get incorrect information. I try to interpret what I read/learn and relay it back in my own unique way. If anyone has an issue or correction to anything that is read on this site, feel free to contact me and let me know at “bemoreyouhealth@gmail.com” Thank you for reading and always share love and kindness. 

Anxiety is such a crazy concept. In some instances, it can help the mind become focused and alert to important tasks on hand, and in others, you can be throwing up or balled up on the floor shaking for reasons you don’t understand — both of which are commonly experienced during circumstances that are new and appear scary. Anxiety can be brought on by numerous things, and it isn’t just one feeling that happens, if severe, it can even seem to cause physical pain to your body. I recommend reading the book On Edge: A Journey Through Anxiety by Andrea Petersen if you don’t understand the feelings of anxiety, or you’re having trouble identifying it yourself. This book helped me realize I am not alone. 

Here’s general mental health tips and some tips I use to slow my anxiety attacks and balance my stress levels:

1. Admit to yourself that there is a problem, make a list of your symptoms, and DO NOT GOOGLE THEM. Sometimes the internet can do a lot more damage than helping, and you’ll research so deep you’ll diagnose yourself with a brain tumor and twelve other kinds of cancers. It just causes more stress, just be aware there is a problem; it’s easier to stop it.
2. Get real help. Find out if your health insurance covers therapy, or even seek a neurologist. They study the brain and would be able to help you identify your main issue. Bring your list of symptoms, so you don’t leave anything out. Don’t be afraid of a psychiatrist or psychologist, they went to school just like your primary physician did, and they have no less practice than they do. Now if you don’t/can’t seek professional help, seek help from your loved ones, you never know who might be able to relate and even help you.
3. Know your limits. It took me a long time to figure out how much I can handle in a day. Some days I feel like superwomen and can balance school, work, gym, family, and friends all within the 24 hours of the day, and manage to eat and use the bathroom. But that’s an unrealistic expectation of every day when your brain isn’t always on the same page as you. It’s important not to let others, or yourself put unnecessary demands on you or your day. Balance is key, and it’s okay to not fit everything in today, especially a day you mentally feel weak. Remember that social media is full of fakers, someone may constantly be posting about how jam-packed there day is and how productive they are, but most of it is for attention, not for authenticity.
4. Avoid the stress. We all have people or situations that stress us TF out, and we have to learn to avoid them. I’m not saying to avoid a job interview or a life — changing opportunity because it’s stressful, but avoid that nasty girl at school that upsets you, or don’t go to the coffee shop that always messes up your order. Eliminate the little triggers in your life, because even something small can cause a chain reaction of an unhappy day. 
5. Try breathing exercises. Oxygen is a super important food for the brain, like basically the most important thing keeping it functioning. Did you know that’s why we yawn? Simply put, it allows an abundance of oxygen into the brain to help keep us awake. There are a lot of breathing exercises listed online- and focusing on breathing helps distract your mind in stressful situations. Slow breathing, for example, is very important during panic attacks because it helps slow the heart rate and calms the body. This blog is pretty cool, and where I learned some of the breathing techniques I use daily: [https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/in-practice/201607/breathing-techniques-anxiety].
6. Express yourself. This is the most important one to me because holding feelings and stress in will cause it to build and fester until you metaphorically or actually explode. That feeling is the worst, pushing a feeling so far down into your gut you think you might poop it out (haha, gross)! Instead, speak up. You deserve to be listened to, and most likely, whatever you voice will be taken into consideration. You have to block out thinking about the “worst-case scenario,” and instead consider no scenarios. Nothing will happen until it actually happens. Just practice kindness and peace, and your words will be understood. 
7. If you are anticipating an event or anxious about anything, here’s a few self-calming basic things to try:

• Take a relaxing bath or shower
• Go for a walk
• Do a face mask and pamper yourself
• Clean your room, clean house = clean mind
• Watch TV or a funny movie
• Talk to someone you trust and value
• Write down how you feel in a journal
• Remind yourself your worth, don’t doubt your capabilities
• Turn off your phone for awhile

I really want to emphasize the line I said in number six, “You have to block out thinking about the “worst-case scenario,” and instead consider no scenarios. Nothing will happen until it actually happens.” Yes, I am quoting myself how philosophical! But realistically, that’s the main problem with anxiety; it’s anticipating what happens next. NO. That’s what we have to fight to stop thinking about. It’s unrealistic to say that mastering that will stop all of your anxiety, but what I am saying is, identifying and striving to remove that central issue, will begin the journey of calming and gaining control of your mind. 

Disclaimer: I am in no way a medical professional. Nothing said on this blog is meant to cure or diagnose anyone or anything. I just want others to know; they are not alone. I am only a 19-year-old girl who does make mistakes and may also get incorrect information. I try to interpret what I read/learn and relay it back in my own unique way. If anyone has an issue or correction to anything that is read on this site, feel free to contact me and let me know at “bemoreyouhealth@gmail.com” Thank you for reading and always share love and kindness. 

This is the first post on my new blog. I’m just getting this started, so stay tuned for more. Subscribe below to get notified when I post new updates and check out my “About” page to learn more about me, Sara, and why I am starting this blog in the first place! Spread love and kindness.